Overview
When Edward’s search for his biological family leads him and his girlfriend Ryley to a magnificent villa high in the mountains of Northern Portugal, he is full of excitement at meeting his long-lost mother and twin brother. Finally, he will discover who he is and where he comes from. But nothing is as it seems, and Edward will soon learn that he is linked to them by a monstrous secret.
Review
If you think your significant other has mommy issues, think again!
Amelia’s Children is another witch story that really goes nowhere new. Well-acted, well-shot, just nothing special. It was really hard to buy the entire witch backstory with any real grain of dread. The reveal towards the end of what’s hidden in the basement is just as unbelievable.
The diabolical character in this film (the mom/witch) is basically an older, trumped up version of a Jennifer Coolidge-esque character complete with a fucked up face and lip job.
Click To Reveal Spoilers
The girlfriend Ryley gets best supporting character (not actress) for her still wanting to save her boyfriend after getting a call from the genetics company stating that his tests came back and he’s inbred. Also, she walks into the room when her boyfriend is getting ravished by mommy (her possible future mother-in-law). In this scene, the crone’s bloated corpse-like body is bouncing on her own son’s loins. Thankfully it wasn’t filmed reverse-cowgirl or it might have made my ‘most disturbing movies’ list.
Now if I were Ryley, there’s just no coming back from this; there’s no way in hell to rekindle your lovelife with Edward. I’d leave his ass in Northern Portugal. Instead, she risks it all, frees him and drives away to safety in the end. But the real horror would start days/weeks/months/years later during their next lovemaking session when she flashes back to the incestuous peepshow or pictures herself impregnated with a peculiar-looking fetus with lopsided head.
Other than that, since this review is spoiler-full, this witchy bitch keeps her husband chained in the basement for really no purpose since she prefers sex with her children to rejuvenate her youth, keeping the male offspring for future fuck-buddies and murdering (and maybe eating) the females.
While not a terrible film, Amelia’s Children just didn’t move me, scare me, or lull me into any real belief in the strange circumstances surrounding Edward’s family reunion.
Rating: ★★ (out of 5)
