Sinister Screens

Lovely, Dark, and Deep (2023) ★★


Lennon, a new back-country ranger, travels alone through the dangerous wilderness, hoping to uncover the origins of a tragedy that has haunted her since she was a child.


I’ve been underwhelmed so far on 2024 horror movie releases. Prior to this post, I’ve watched 12 new horror flicks being released digitally in 2024 and those movies have earned a total of 24 total stars (so an average of 2-stars per movie). Lovely, Dark and Deep was a movie which I had highly anticipated and hoped would snap this horror movie slump.

Was it a lovely horror movie? Nope.

Was it a dark horror movie. Not really.

Was is a deep horror movie. Not even close.

So what was it, you ask?

A better name would be Boring, Quiet, and Deeply Disappointing.

It was a quiet horror movie with not much action, scares or eeriness except for the backdrop of the woods. Only a scene or two in the entire movie motivated an increased heart rate.

This is another movie where horror skirts around the difficult job of actually doing the work it takes to frighten. Horror movie fans have to be getting tired of the staple movie these days which revolves around a grief-stricken protagonist who may or not not be experiencing a supernatural event…or, maybe they’re just a bit psychologically broken. Writers / Directors make it ambiguous enough so that a coin can be flipped and the viewer can decide. Then the director of these types of films will substitute chills in the form of flashbacks, hallucinations, or, worse yet, waking dreams.

Maybe I’m yearning for a real monster to come crashing through the underbrush, snatch up a hiker and actually tear them apart limb for limb, devour every last morsel, and then belch in the face of a park ranger. I dunno. But I do like quiet horror, but not this new movement of scapegoat horror films that cling to the vehicles of grief or PTSD to further the genre tag.

During the first 30 minutes of this film nothing happens except light character building. Maybe worth it if you even knew or really cared about the main character in the end, which I didn’t. The rest of the film you get perhaps a little more intrigue, but no real scares or original content.

Robert Frost as a movie critic would surely write:

The movie was called “Lovely, Dark, and Deep”,   
But after I watched it, I couldn’t give a bleep,
I wouldn’t recommend it to any horror peep, 
And instead cast it atop a dung-filled heap.

Rating: ★★ (out of 5)

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